The Axis of Eggheads had determined it was time for them to strike.
The Axis had become well aware of their own fragility. It was the yoke, I mean the yolk, no sorry, I did mean the yoke that bound them to this world. So, hey, being human and having limitations is something most of learn to acknowledge. Or, instead, you could try to destroy the world. Show that world, hey, don’t fuck with me!
This was why, until recently, the Axis had been behind bars, leaving only their fans to talk about them on the Dark Web.
Oh, Darkwing Duck, come and save us from this mess! Don’t let us down. Because ducks and down. Little girls pray to you. Ryan Gosling prays to you. Darkwing, if only you were my nesting partner.
How dare you ask about the Axiom! The whole purpose of the Axiom is that it is above the horizon of questioning. Like the Noble Gases. Like Yo Yo Ma. Like Yo Mama. Like Maury Povich. Like Shostakovich.
Anyway, instead of “Release the Kraken!” someone heard “Release the Crackheads!”
Thus were the Axis of Eggheads at liberty. What a terrible idea, unless you believe in the rapture or something.
Should we give them the benefit of the doubt? If so, while we wait for the apocalypse, what should we do with the last night of our one, precious, beautiful life? Should I give you all the pleasure I know that you know that you wanted me to all this time? Or does stress give you the vaginismus? Of course, you’re not wrong. But, no matter what, let’s go out with openness and transparency. If we were made with ax wounds, let’s open up those wounds tonight.